Background

In December of 2024, I talked about using scrum around the holidays to manage and schedule household activities. Here's the link:

• How We Used Scrum to Schedule our Holidays

What we were really trying to protect was peace: fewer surprises and more shared clarity.

A few things have changed, but the principles remain the same:

• iterative approaches to managing tasks and projects
• regular, structured meetings to synchronize
• accountability for getting stuff done

These haven't changed. They couldn't change without the whole thing falling apart.

After the holidays, we made a few changes to better match how we were actually using it. We iterated on how we iterated: we adjusted the system based on what actually worked.

We found that iterations (sprints) that were one week long worked well for us. The tasks we had weren't large, development-style items; as a result, most of them were pretty consistently accomplished once they were scheduled and any blockers were removed.

Identifying blockers was a bit of a challenge. It was new to try to figure out everything we needed for tasks like, "replace the toilet" or "rewire the ceiling light switch." Things would come up like, "the subflooring needs repair" and "the upstairs switch used California-style wiring and none of the conductors were labeled."

Individually, these were small things; however, they could easily turn a task expected to be two hours long into one that was two days long. Some of these details were only possible once the tasks were started (e.g., the old toilet was removed), so planning around them was difficult.

In software, blockers are often dependencies. In home life, blockers are hidden realities behind drywall.

Standups

Standups often turned into planning sessions and status updates. It was tricky to strike a balance between pedantic about how Agile scrum says standup meetings were supposed to go and how we actually used them. Too much structure became a challenge while not having a strong pattern of consistent approach made setting expectations difficult. Given our respective DiSC tendencies and Meyers-Briggs personality types, it was useful to write down exactly what the expectations were so that we could both be successful.

We learned that the goal wasn't purity. The goal was predictability.

Weekly Planning

As with standups, the weekly planning sessions needed some tweaking and some documentation. One may be able to anticipate what a demo of a software project may entail; however, translating that to replacing toilets and updating electrical work felt awkward. It was a little weird for one of us to say to the other, "you know that toilet I swapped out last Tuesday? Would you care to join me in the bathroom so I can show you how to flush?"

As a result, we cut back on the amount of time spent in review and demonstration and added it to our planning portion.

Clean Time Blocking

To help meet expectations -- to be more assured of successful execution -- it was helpful to document how much time we needed to go through each phase of the weekly meeting. This extra layer of rigidity was helpful to keep focused and clear on what we were doing.

Scheduling

We used our calendar system to keep things on-track.

We kept a short daily standup, and on Mondays we followed it with a longer weekly alignment block. On Mondays, we had a 15 minute standup immediately followed by a 45 minute planning session. All in all, we slotted an hour for Mondays and an hour for the rest of the week's meetings.

Flexibility

It was critically important to remain flexible, even with the structure. If we needed to travel or attend a meeting or go to an appointment, that's fine, just pick it back up the next day. If we wanted to take a day and just meld into the couch, that was acceptable, too. We tried to stay on-track and be accountable, but we were also aware that stuff happens. Life happens.

What surprised me most is that Scrum didn't primarily help us get more done.

It helped us misunderstand each other less.

It helped us stay accountable to our shared priorities.

Things that could very easily slip through the cracks were called out directly and without blame.

Unspoken expectations are often the source of friction; as a mentor of mine would say, "[unspoken] expectations are resentments waiting to happen."

Scrum gave us a safe place to speak these expectations and bring them into the light.

Be kind to other people; however, just as importantly, be kind to yourself.

Templates

Below are templates for the event descriptions; feel free to adopt and modify per your own needs.

Standup

Daily Standup and Synchronization

Goal

• Daily alignment and early identification of constraints.

Agenda (in order)

1. Completed: What did I get done since yesterday that matters?
2. Planned: What am I intending to focus on today?
3. Blockers / Constraints: Is anything slowing progress or creating friction?
4. Parking Lot: Topics worth discussing later (outside standup).

Working Agreements

• Keep updates short and factual.
• Standup is for synchronization, not problem-solving.
• Parking Lot items get scheduled separately.
• End on time.

Agile Ceremonies

Weekly Alignment and Planning

Goal

Review last week, adjust, and commit to this week.

Agenda (in order)

1. Demo / Wins (5-10 minutes)

• What did we complete last week?
• What worked well?
• Any visible progress worth acknowledging?
• Keep this factual and forward-facing

2. Retro (5-10 minutes)

• What helped us last week?
• What created friction?
• One improvement we’ll try this week

3. Planning (20-25 minutes)

• Major priorities for this week (top 3 each, max).
• Known constraints (travel, appointments, deadlines).
• Any coordination needed?

Wrap-up

Close with:

• "We agree these are our primary focuses for the week."